Friday, June 15, 2007

Fictional Friday - It All Starts Here

Alright, it's been a long day, so this is coming kind of late. It was pretty fun though. I don't normally begin writing something without planning out out first(I can't plan too much since you guys are choosing where this goes). That should make this interesting. I think it worked for the first entry, hopefully it will continue to work through the rest of the story. I wasn't really sure how long to make it. I'm sure I'll get more a feel for that, as this goes. Any comments on the length(or the writing in general) are welcome. I'm open to criticism as long as it's constructive. Make sure you remember to vote too! Anyway, here is the first entry in this, so far, nameless story.


Jerry sat in shock as he watched the men disappear into the dense forest dragging Samantha with them. He tried to cry out, but no words came. All that came out were some vague guttural noises.

Looking around at the small glade, a flood of emotions and memories overwhelmed him. Memories of the night they discovered the glade. They had snuck away from their childhood responsibilities to be together. Over the years, they had frequently come back to this place when they wanted to be alone.

This time, they had come to hide. A messenger had come to warn them that the men were coming for Sam, but it was too late. They must have seen the two of them running off into the woods. They knew it wasn’t a very good hiding spot, but they couldn’t think of anywhere else to go.

A sudden clap of thunder and flash of lightning brought Jerry back to the present. Already the footsteps were fading. Before long, he would not be able to hear them. He had to find some way to get loose. The men had forced him to the ground before wrapping his arms behind his back and around a tree. He had not seen what they used to tie his wrists together, but it felt like a rough cloth of some kind.

As he struggled to free himself, a heavy rain began to fall. After several minutes of pulling, twisting, tugging, writhing, and any combination of other movements he thought might loosen his bonds, his wrists began to bleed. He didn’t notice the pain though. All he noticed was that the rain had began to soak into the cloth that bound his hands. Gradually, his efforts were loosening his restraints.

By the time he was free, nearly an hour had passed since Samantha had been dragged away. As soon as the wet bloody rag fell from his wrists, he stood up to begin the chase. He made it three steps before collapsing. He wouldn’t have made it that far if not for the momentum from his right leg. His left leg had apparently been dislocated at the hip during the fight. The sudden jolt of pain made his stomach churn. Moments later, he lay unconscious on the ground.

What should Jerry do when he regains consciousness?
A)Begin chasing after Samantha and her captors immediately! He's got to make up for lost time.
B)Go back to the village, see if anyone else was injured/taken, and hopefully find some more people to help.
C)Heal up and then begin intense physical training so he will have the strength to fend of the dangers of his coming adventure.


Oh and by the way, the last vote decided that the main character's primary driving force in this tale will be his lust for revenge.

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7 Comments:

Shadow said...

I'd like an "A" please, John.

June 16, 2007 6:07 AM  
Lynn said...

My but the story is a little dire -- what to do -- yes I have say A as well -- no time to loose !

June 16, 2007 5:07 PM  
stena said...

B ..what has happened in the village, and a sidekick and helpmate could come in handy

June 16, 2007 10:25 PM  
Ryuji_Ishida said...

This is a tough choice, too bad there isn't a combination of "A" and "C". I would have to say "C" because he is not going to be of help to anyone in that state. By the way your a good writer.

June 17, 2007 1:15 PM  
Josh & Jen said...

awesome john. at first i thought this was that story that you wrote a long time ago hehe guess i was completely wrong. i'd say an A would be my preference this is josh by the way.

June 18, 2007 12:39 AM  
stena said...

after a month and a half, you need a new choice

Poor Jerry has been unconscious for a really long time now. Who know what they have done with Samantha or where they have taken here... I think Jerry need to go and find out as much Information as he can before he runs off blindly to fine her

August 9, 2007 5:18 AM  
Jonathan said...

Although A would probably be the best , C seems more appropriate since he will not be able to move much with a dislocated hip.

August 22, 2007 11:07 PM  

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